13 Reasons No One In Their Right Mind Visits Oregon In The Winter

Everyone knows that Oregon is a horrible place to be during winter months. I mean really - who likes snowy landscapes, skiing, frozen waterfalls, and the majesty of King Tides? If you know anyone who is planning on visiting the Beaver State this winter, just show them this list, and they're certain to change their minds.

1. Oregon's National Park is ugly and boring in the winter.

As you can see, it's crowded with tourists, and the views aren't anything special.

2. Our National Forests aren't very pretty, either.

Evergreens covered in snow, frozen lakes, and a wintery landscape? No thank you.

3. You can't even go outdoors because of all the snow.

I mean, who can hike in these treacherous conditions?

4. Oregon's winter college sports aren't very exciting.

A Pac-12 Championship really isn't that big of a deal, is it?

5. It's pretty much impossible to spend any quality family time together here.

We suppose you can huddle in a hotel room and play Go Fish or something.

6. Oregon's waterfalls aren't even worth checking out when they're all icy.

Is there anything exciting about a frozen waterfall?

7. The ocean is gray and boring.

Clearly, those King Tides are highly overrated.

8. No one has any fun at all during the winter.

Every Oregonian is bored to death from November all the way through March.

9. All the wildlife in Oregon goes into hiding in the winter.

Good luck catching a glimpse of the Roosevelt Elk at the Dean Creek Viewing Area!

10. The rivers in the Beaver State aren't worth visiting either.

We've heard you can fish in some of these chilly winter rivers, but that's probably just a rumor.

11. Speaking of fish, we hope you don't expect any fresh seafood here in the winter.

Crabs? What crabs?

12. The Columbia River Gorge has nothing to offer visitors after October.

Hiking? We don't think so.

13. The sunsets are hideous during winter months.

We can't imagine schlepping out into the cold just to photograph something like this.

OK, on second thought, Oregon is a pretty great place to be, all four seasons of the year. But shhhhh...don't tell anyone!