Maryland December 14, 2016
16 Reasons Why You Should Never, Ever Move To Maryland
Maryland is a one-of-a-kind state and its residents are just as unique. There are some things that only Marylanders understand, and things that out-of-staters will never be able to wrap their heads around. Here are 16 cheeky reasons why you should never, ever move to Maryland. It’s awful. 😉
1. You'll get crabs.
So many crabs.
2. They'll even start infesting your car windows.
3. There's too much beauty to explore. You'll probably get lost.
It was nice knowing you.
4. And stay away from the beaches. You'll get sand in your eyes.
You've been warned.
5. You'll notice less money in your bank account but more sports memorabilia in your closet. How does this happen?!
It's downright unexplainable.
6. You'll gain weight.
...But it's so worth it.
7. You'll become addicted to this drug.
I have a contact high just looking at this photo.
8. Maryland winters are the worst.
Nothing to see here.
9. And don't even get me started on the
ordinary Christmas decorations.
10. There are too many adventures to be had. It's overwhelming and unnecessary.
This looks like too much fun.
11. There are too many small towns.
They're suspiciously quiet.
12. And there's absolutely nothing to do in the cities.
13. You'll probably get sick of the views.
14. You'll spend all of your money at Maryland restaurants.
It's a trap.
15. Seriously, who could possibly eat all this seafood?
A crazy person, that's who.
16. The traffic is terrible.
...Okay, well maybe not on
all roads. But most, I swear!
Just don’t move to Maryland. You’ll be woefully smitten and may never be the same.
You may also enjoy reading
these 11 surefire ways to make a Marylander mad!