Florida April 26, 2016
Not Many People Realize That These 15 Things Are Actually Illegal In Florida
Florida has some strange criminals, so it only seems fitting that we would have some strange old laws on the books. From the looks of these arcane laws, Florida Man has been around for a long time. Did you know all of these things were technically illegal in our state?
1. The same parking fee for a vehicle must be paid for an elephant tied to a parking meter.
Don't you hate it when you pull up to the only good spot and there's an elephant there?
2. Skateboarding without a license is illegal.
Did you know there were skateboarding licenses?
3. Men may not wear a strapless gown in public.
So, gowns with straps are OK? What's so offensive about strapless gowns in particular?
4. In Miami, selling oranges on the street is illegal.
That's kind of strange, since this is Florida and all.
5. Women who fall asleep under a hair dryer may be fined, as can the salon owner.
Have you ever been to the salon when you're sleepy? This one is really hard not to break.
6. You may not kiss your wife's breasts
Wow, this is getting personal.
7. Florida's state constitution prohibits confining pregnant pigs to cages.
I'm sure pigs can appreciate this law, but does it have to be in the state constitution?
8. Selling your kids is illegal.
It's pretty sad that we needed a law for this.
9. Stealing a horse is a crime punishable by hanging.
Don't test this one. In some parts of Florida, we take our horses very seriously.
10. Singing in public while wearing a bathing suit is illegal.
I guess one too many beach parties got annoying.
11. All doors must open outward on public buildings.
This supposedly has to do with high winds that could blow the doors in.
12. It is illegal to have sexual relations with a porcupine.
Sometimes, the law protects you from yourself.
13. Showering naked is prohibited.
I'm sure everyone in Florida has broken this law a few times.
14. Unmarried women are prohibited from parachuting on Sunday under possible punishment of arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
All I can say is why? And why is it OK for married women?
15. In one town in Florida, chickens are considered a protected species.
Can you guess which one it is? Key West, of course.
Did you know about these weird Florida laws? Are there any others we didn’t mention?