D.C. November 16, 2017
10 Foolproof Ways To Spot An Imposter In Washington DC
Not everyone is from DC. Most people are transplants. But even if we’ve lived here for a year or our entire lives, there are some things that we just know, understand and expect as a Washingtonian. So if you come to DC for a trip or you commute in for the day, then we have to tell you that you might be a DC imposter. Here are 9 ways to spot an imposter in DC.
1. They think the Metro is convenient.
At first glance the Metro looks convenient but if you’re a true Washingtonian you know that it will break down, track work will screw up your commute and the Red Line is never on time.
2. They are good drivers.
Ok, so there might be some good drivers in DC. But when it rains or snows, drivers in the city cannot handle the roads.
3. They get excited about motorcades.
We know that it’s cool that the President lives here and that you might seem them drive past. but motorcades create traffic and will undoubtedly make you late for something.
4. They only have one degree.
Alright, so there are some people who who don’t have multiple degrees. But we’re full of overachievers. It’s not uncommon for everyone at the party to have multiple graduate degrees.
5. They own any piece of Cowboys apparel.
Not everyone here is a Redskins fan but please don’t show up here in anything Cowboy related. You will not fit in.
6. They pay cash on the bus.
MetroCard work on the Metro and on buses. No need to pay cash. Get a MetroCard and your life will be so much easier
7. They remain calm during snowstorms.
We don’t care if it’s supposed to snow half an inch or a foot and a half, we Washingtonians will clear out the stores and expect schools and offices to be closed. We batten down the hatches at even the slightest hint of snow!
8. They stand on the left side of the escalator.
If there is only one rule here, it’s that one. Stand right, walk left on every escalator but especially on the ones in the Metro station!
9. They can’t spot Secret Service agents.
Black cars sitting outside houses. Men standing on roofs or situated at corners. In DC, you become adapted to spotting those ever-present Secret Service agents around the District.
10. They have Virginia or Maryland license plate.
Even if work in the District or play in the District, if you don’t live here or were not born here, then we are on to you. So don’t tell someone you’re from DC if you are really from a suburb because your license plate will give you away.
So have you ever spotted an imposter in DC?
Here are some ways to spot people from DC no matter where they are!