Wisconsin November 20, 2015
11 Things You’ve Grown To Undeniably Hate If You’re From Wisconsin
Wisconsin is an awesome state. I obviously think so, I write about it every day. BUT, there are definitely some things about the state that drive us a little cuckoo, and that’s okay to admit. Here are 11 things people from Wisconsin grow to hate.
1. Comparisons to Illinois
If I never hear "I can't believe you don't have X store, Chicago has 15," I would be so happy. Things tend to get tested out in larger markets, which makes total sense. And do we really need another overpriced froyo place? You can keep the proliferation of overpriced froyo shops, Illinois.
2. Illinois drivers
Okay, you come to visit but then you drive like you are in rush hour in Chicago, swerving in and out of lanes and bringing your road rage with you. You are easily spotted by your Illinois vanity plate. This is why you are known as a "FIB."
3. Da Bears
We don't HATE in the sense of true "hate" the Bears. In fact, numerous Bears fans have gone out of their way to write about how warmly they are received at Lambeau Field. But the Bears still SUCK.
Some of our plants stink. A lot. I'm looking at you Kaukauna. And Sanimax in Green Bay. Yuck.
5. Condescending tourists
By all means, please, visit Wisconsin. There is a lot to see in our state. But condescending tourists who say things like "how cute" drive me nuts. Sure, we like tradition up here and the nostalgia aspect will bring you back. But news flash: it is 2015 in Wisconsin and we are a modern society. K, thanks.
6. Cold cars
Getting into a cold car in the winter is the worst, guys. It is such a yucky start to the day.
Here's the thing--when the Packers play, traffic is crazy on 43. It stinks. But we deal with it because the Packers are awesome.
People who eat margarine have truly joined the dark side. It is criminal when there is so much good butter here. Also YUCK YUCK YUCK!
Probably the biggest downside to living in Wisconsin is the snow. It stinks. Winters can be very harsh and long and not fun at all. You deal with it, though.
10. Road construction
I swear, we must be building stuff simply so we don't lose the money. Why do we need so many roundabouts? Can I get an amen?
11. Getting made fun of for our talking
We talk in a certain way up here, saying things like "come here once" and "stop and go lights." Sure, other people from Wisconsin aren't going to poke fun of you for it but it is not so nice when others come into our state and go "what?"
Whew. I’m glad I was able to get that out of my system. Hopefully this is cathartic for you, too.
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