Vermont November 19, 2017
15 Foolproof Ways To Spot An Impostor In Vermont
Vermonters have pretty thick skin, so we have no problem laughing at ourselves. Since we’re able to able to laugh at ourselves, it’s impossible not to get a chuckle out of flatlanders who come to the Green Mountain State. They can certainly stand out with a few telltale signs that clearly demonstrate they they aren’t from here and they are merely an impostor in VT.
1. They'll always lock the car... or the house.
Most of Vermont is pretty safe, so along with not locking doors, it's also common to leave your car keys in the console for easy access.
2. They don't really like the outdoors.
Then why even come here?
3. They don't take their shoes off when they come into your house.
Unless you're going to mop the floors on your way out, take 'em off!
4. They have all wheel tires.
5. They don't know how to drive in the snow.
I know it's not exactly easy, but practice certainly helps!
6. You'll see them drinking Heady Topper from a glass.
I mean.... It couldn't be more straightforward.
Read the can, then drink from it.
7. They'll eat generic cheese.
Maybe not while they're here, but I'd be suspect their home isn't all Cabot and Grafton. Just saying.
8. DIY survival skills are foreign to them.
It's handy to know how to do things like change a flat tire. Notice this guy even uses the curb for added security in case the jack slips as it's slightly downhill. Well done, sir!
9. They call coats "Parkas."
You'll mostly find this term used by non-802ers in ski towns and especially over the holidays.
10. Their snow pants are creased.
Sure, we have all had brand spanking new winter gear at some point, but it's quickly coated in mud or dirt from day to day life.
11. They don't know what to do at a three way stop.
Stop. Wait your turn. Go. Is it really so difficult?
12. They look confused.
A short walk along a main street in a small town they'll look utterly confused and sometimes ask "Is this it?!" Or more often they'll wonder out loud "What do people DO here for a living?"
13. They'll wear shoes that stick out like a sore thumb
Save those shoes for back home in Kansas, Dorothy.
14. They may not know how to pump their own gas.
We've always been self sufficient at the pumps.
15. They don't smile nearly as much as Vermonters.
Moreover, a dead giveaway is not getting a smile or wave when passing on a quiet street.
You may be an impostor in VT, but sometimes we can’t blame you. Here are
14 reasons why everyone should marry a Vermonter.