There are some things you just don’t say on Ohio ground. Take the following as simple advice on what not to say to us when you’re on our turf—or simply anytime you engage in conversation with us, regardless of where we are.

1) “Go, Blue!"
Gerald R. Ford School of Public Policy, University of Michigan/Flickr
We’ll stop talking to you. We will straight up stop talking to you.
2) "Everyone in Ohio won’t shut up about the Buckeyes.”
Sam Howzit/Flickr
No. No we probably won’t—and you saying that will probably just inspire us to talk about them even more.
3) “It’s not ‘pop,’ it’s ‘soda.’”
Ted and Dani Percival/Flickr
YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN STOP ACTING LIKE WE’RE ALIENS.
4) “What’s cow tipping like?”
Steven Zolneczko/Flickr
I don’t know. None of us know. We don’t know because we don’t do that here.
5) “If it’s going to snow then I’m not driving anywhere.”
Vishpool/Flickr
Oh please. Step aside and watch how it’s done.
6) “People in Ohio complain about the weather all the time.”
B Rosen/Flickr
UH, you try living where designated seasons aren’t real and you sometimes use the AC and heat in the same day and you feel like you’re in a constant state of weather-induced confusion. You try that. You try that and THEN get back to us on that one.
7) "Why do you cheer for the Bengals/Browns/Reds/Indians?”
IndyDina/Flickr
Why is the sky blue?
8) “LeBron James...”
Keith Allison/Flickr
We will legitimately pretend we didn’t hear you bring up his name and ask you an absurd question or say something completely nonsensical to incite intense confusion in the hopes of permanently diverting you from the topic.

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9) “Ohio is boring.”
Mark Spearman/Flickr
YOU’RE boring. Step outside the house for a change when you’re here and you might think twice before you say that.
10) “Skyline chili isn’t real chili.”
Joe Hall/Flickr
You only think that because you’ve been eating inside the lines for way too long.
11) “What’s a ‘sweeper?’”
Jerone2/Flickr
A VACUUM CLEANER. FOR THE LAST TIME, A VACUUM CLEANER.
12) “Ohio is nothing but cornfields.”
Daniel Bauer/Flickr
1) Stop saying that. 2) That’s physically impossible. We have roads and stores and various other establishments that require land free of corn.
13) “Nothing cool ever comes from Ohio.”
Jeremy Thompson/Flickr
Erik Drost/Flickr
The Deli New England/Flickr
Raymond Twist/Flickr
Recuerdos de Pandora/Flickr
FALSE.

What else do you think shouldn’t be said to an Ohioan?

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