Cleveland May 25, 2017
11 Awkward Moments Every Clevelander Has Endured At Least Once
Cleveland is undeniably a great place, and chances are if you’ve ever called it home you’ve had a story or two to back up just how awesome it is. Unfortunately, though, we Clevelanders seem to have an easy time finding our way into some pretty awkward situations. We’re sure you have experienced a handful of these awkward moments at least once:
1. When you thought you dressed accordingly.
There is nothing worse than when you dress in layers in preparation for a chilly day, and then the building you have to spend the day in has the heat turned all the way up. The same can be said for those hot summer days where you put on shorts, but then get to the movie theatre or grocery store and the air conditioning makes you feel like you’re at the North Pole.
2. When waffle fries aren’t enough.
Mr. Hero has taught Northeast Ohioans the art of pairing waffle fries with Romanburgers, and now when we visit submarine sandwich shops outside of Northeast Ohio, Columbus, or Toledo, it is nearly impossible to satisfy our cravings.
3. When you accidentally lock eyes with a Pittsburgh Steelers Fan.
When you encounter someone wearing Steelers garb, you can practically feel the weight of the tension in the air. But when you lock eyes with them, well, you know how it goes.
4. When you’re traveling outside of the Home of Rock ‘n Roll and you’re looking for a radio station.
"Why are there so many country stations? Where is my classic rock?"
5. When someone asks you why you have so many A Christmas Story decorations.
Whenever someone inquires as to why you seem to have a fascination with A Christmas Story, you respond with a blank stare. Step two is the wave of surprise when you realize that they truly haven’t visited the house in Tremont, and that you now have the honor of enlightening them on the history of one of our most beloved homes.
6. When someone comments on your accent.
LOL, accent?! I don’t have an accent!
7. When you use "tree lawn" in a sentence around an out-of-stater.
It is remarkable to think that it is fairly uncommon to hear "tree lawn" used outside of Cleveland. However, it is pretty funny how non-Clevelanders look at you as if just revealed your true identity as a lizard person when they hear you use this term.
8. When you get lost in the Cleveland Metroparks every now and then.
It is no wonder that the Cleveland Metroparks are collectively called The Emerald Necklace, as this expanse of nature preserves is composed of over 21,000 acres of terrain. With so many unique features to explore, including an abandoned castle, large gorges, and old quarries, it is also no surprise that it is easy to get excited, explore a bit, then find that you have no idea where you are.
9. When you go to order a Polish Boy, but then you realize you’re outside of Cleveland.
Yeah, it’s true that you will feel kind of awkward explaining what this delicacy is. But you mostly just feel sad for the person who has never experienced this unique Cleveland meal.
10. Resisting the urge to do that O-H-I-O arm thing whenever you hear Hang on Sloopy in public.
Once you have heard our great state’s name spelled out in the pauses of this catchy song’s chorus, it just feels right. In fact, your response is almost instinctual. Even if you stop your arms from flying in the air, your brain still rebelliously spells out Ohio.
11. That face you make when you go to drive through a puddle but come to find that it was actually a pothole.
Not only does your heart momentarily hop out of your chest, but, sometimes, you are going slow enough to see passing drivers cringe as they acknowledge your mistake.
Fortunately, Clevelanders are born with a great sense of humor, so we can always look back on these cringe-worthy moments and chuckle. What are some other awkward moments every Clevelander has experienced? Tell us about some of your favorites!