11 Reasons Why You Should Never, Ever Move To Kansas City
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Clarisa
Author
Some may ask “Why do you even live there?” …but only because they don’t know just how great it is. Maybe it’s better if we tell everyone how awful it is to make sure they never, ever move to Kansas City. We don’t need those negative attitudes here!
There's no way anyone important was created here, obviously. Surely not a worldwide sensation.
We don't have any big attractions or festivals, you can be sure of that.
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No pride for the Chiefs, Royals, or Sporting KC. None at all.
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Vineyards? What are those? It's all farmland out there. No scenery whatsoever.
You've got that right. That's all we eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. What's a "ta-co?" Never heard of it.
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We haven't ever won any awards or hosted an annual nationwide competition for it, I promise.
That's why we don't have any art museums, sculptures, or fountains anywhere. We like it cold and boring!
There's nothing to see here. Skylines and rivers are boring. Just move along.
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We don't have any history of music, especially jazz. This building is empty inside. We don't even use it.
Everything's shipped from overseas and we hate eating farm-to-table. Fresh food is overrated.
There's nothing to do on weekends, or even weeknights. We don't have any sort of tourism or leisure activities, so you're probably better off ignoring Kansas City from now on.
Do you think this will keep them away? After all this “negativity” about our city, let’s check out some odd, yet awesome things to do around here. Maybe you’ll find a new favorite hangout?
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