Michigan November 15, 2017
10 Phrases That No True Michigander Would Ever Utter
When you live here in the Great Lakes State, you follow a set of unwritten rules. While no two Michiganders are precisely the same, there are a few guidelines we can all agree on — and a few things we just don’t say. Here are 10 sentences that you’ll never hear a true Michigander utter.
1. "I’ll have a large soda, please."
Um, excuse me? Did you just say "soda"?! Here in Michigan, we call that fizzy beverage "pop," and no true Michigander would ever use a different name. Even if you’ve recently relocated to the Great Lakes State, we hope you’ll adopt the proper name for your favorite soft drinks.
2. "It’s just too snowy for me to go outside today."
We Michiganders know that getting a day off work or school due to weather is pretty rare. We’re used to the over-the-top snowy weather that comes along with life in our home state, so you’ll never hear us complaining about the abundance of icy coldness that surrounds our homes every winter.
3. "It’s way too cold for a t-shirt."
On the flip side of that coin, we Michiganders are often willing to push the envelope in terms of our winter weather attire. We’re sure you’ve seen it: the guy who refuses to wear anything but basketball shorts, even in below zero temperatures.
4. "I’m a big Ohio State fan."
Whether you root for Michigan State or the University of Michigan, there’s one thing that can always be agreed upon: Ohio State is the worst. You’ll never hear a true Michigander expressing any sort of admiration for our ultimate rivals!
5. "My stomach hurts. Can I have some Pepto Bismol?"
When stomach ailments strike, every Michigander knows that the first order of business is grabbing a delicious glass of Vernor’s. While Pepto and other traditional medicine might be used as a backup plan, nothing beats a sip of Vernor’s for that very first soothing attempt.
6. "We’re heading up to Macki-nack Island this weekend."
Michigan is full of street and city names that might be a bit difficult to pronounce for those who aren’t from the Great Lakes State. But a true Michigander knows how to say even the most unique monikers — especially "Mackinac," which often trips up those from out of state!
7. "Wow, my team is in the Super Bowl this year!"
Oh, the Lions. The team we continue to love despite repeated disappointment. While we never truly give up hope that our boys in blue will someday appear in a Super Bowl, we have to admit that we aren’t expecting it to happen anytime soon. You’re unlikely to hear a lifelong Michigander bragging about their team making it to the final game!
8. "Here, let me show you where I’m from on this map."
Our state is uniquely shaped like a mitten, which means that we can point directly to our hands when newfound friends want to know where we’re from. If you’re a true Michigander, you’ll proudly use the "palm method" whenever possible — and it’s rare to see someone from the Mitten State reference a "normal" map.
9. "I’m not in the mood to go up north."
What? Not in the mood to go up north?! No matter what the phrase "up north" means to you, one thing is for sure: it conjures feelings of family togetherness, relaxation, and fun. Most Michiganders are always keen for a journey up north, and we’ll take the opportunity anytime it arises.
10. "Michigan sure is ugly."
This one is a no-brainer. While non-Michiganders might not understand or appreciate the beauty of our state, those of us lucky enough to live here are deeply proud of our origins. There’s nothing more beautiful than our Great Lakes, forests, and sandy shorelines — and you’ll never hear us complaining about the natural appearance of Michigan.
Alright, Michiganders: it’s your turn to speak up! Are there any other phrases you’d never expect to hear from a true-blue Michigander? Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below!