Iowa December 22, 2015
These 10 Towns In Iowa Are On Santa’s Naughty List This Year
So you think your town is getting a visit from Santa this year, huh? Well if you live in one of these 10 towns in Iowa, I hate to tell you, but it looks like you made the naughty list this year…
According to roadsnacks.net, Manchester is the drunkest city in Iowa. The ranking is based off of statistics on number of bars and pubs per capita, number of wineries per capita, number of liquor stores per capita, each city’s drunk-related Tweets within the past week, and each city’s divorce rate. It looks like Manchester has been naughty, so it's probably safe to say that they are getting a check mark next to their name on Santa's "naughty list."
According to roadsnacks.net, the award for second drunkest town goes to Cherokee. It's just so fun to be naughty, right Cherokee?
3. Clear Lake
And according to the same list, the third drunkest town in Iowa is Clear Lake. Maybe if Santa went out drinking with you guys he wouldn't be so stuck up about who's "naughty" or "nice" right?!
4. Council Bluffs
Acccording to Home Security Shield, Council Bluffs is the most dangerous city in Iowa. Santa might have to lock up his reindeer when he stops in town.
According to the same source, Keokuk is the second most dangerous city in Iowa. You can bet Santa's bringing coal for all the naughty folks here.
Clinton is another of the most dangerous cities in Iowa, so Santa may want to make sure he doesn't let anyone on the naughty list catch him dropping off their coal...
According to stateoftheair.org, in 2014, Davenport was the 13th most polluted city in the country in terms of short term particle pollution. Maybe if Davenport is nicer to the air, Santa will take them off the naughty list.
8. Appanoose County
According to County Health Rankings and Road Maps, Appanoose is the unhealthiest county in the state based off of smoking, excessive drinking, and physical inactivity. Ditch the smokes and Santa will be sure to bring you the goodies this year.
9. Monroe County
According to the same data, Monroe County is the second unhealthiest county in the state. But there's good news Monroe County, Santa says if you leave him an extra cookie, he will "forget" about putting you guys on the naughty list...
10. Adams County
And according to the same data, Adams County is the third unhealthiest county in the state. But hey, are we really going to take health advice from someone who stuffs their face with cookies and milk for a living?
But really though, who is Santa to judge us?! This is the same guy that breaks into other people’s houses, steals their food, and doesn’t even bother to take off his boots before he tramps around your house late at night. Should we really let
this guy tell us who’s naughty or nice?! I think not.