Iowa October 26, 2016
14 Sure-Fire Ways To Make An Iowan Mad
For the most part, Iowans are pretty laid back. There’s a reason that the term “Iowa nice” was coined, and it’s not for our cantankerous dispositions. But there are those hot button issues that will take an Iowan from mellow to mad before you can blink. If you’re planning a visit to Iowa, or you’ve recently moved here, make sure to avoid these 14 sure-fire ways to make an Iowan mad.
1. Assuming we all drive on dirt roads and watch the corn grow for entertainment.
While our farms are a glorious and important part of our state, there’s more to Iowa than corn and pigs. We have cities and towns and paved roads and movie theaters and even cell service and, you know, all of the normal things that every other state has.
2. Tell us, in response to saying we’re from Iowa, “Oh yeah, I flew over that state once.”
There’s a lot to Iowa that makes it worth a stop, including natural beauty, awesome people and probably the best steak you’ll find anywhere, for half of what you’d pay in a big coastal city.
3. Ask us jokingly how things are in Idaho, or Ohio.
Yeah, we get it, person who has never actually visited our state. All of us Midwestern states are the same (yawn). The state is IOWA, and we’re not known for our potatoes.
4. Assuming we all know each other.
Yes, we grew up in Iowa. No, we don’t know that random person who grew up five hours away and is ten years younger. But if we ever happen to run into him, we’ll say “hey.”
5. Assume we’re old-fashioned and not progressive.
Iowa was the 2nd state to allow women to own property. We were the 2nd state to legalize interracial marriage. We were also the 2nd state to legalize gay marriage. Case closed.
6. Turning down comfort food.
We’re a meat and potatoes state. We’re also the home of the annual butter sculpture at our state fair, so yeah, we might eat kale and love fresh produce from farmer’s markets, but we won’t turn up our noses at a fried breaded tenderloin the size of our head.
7. When we tell you we live in Iowa and you ask in a puzzled voice, “Why?”
We don’t ask you why you live where you do, because in Iowa, we have this thing called manners.
8. Ask us how we can possibly survive the winters.
Yep, it gets cold here. Really, really cold. But it just comes with the territory, so let’s just move past it already.
9. Tell us corn jokes.
We know there’s a lot of corn. We really can relate to things outside of corn. Ok?
10. Insult any of our home teams.
We’re die-hard fans, and you don’t want to test our loyalty.
11. Not knowing how to drive in the snow.
If you’re a novice winter weather driver, you’re a menace, end of story.
12. Tell us we have an accent.
Sorry, we don’t think so.
13. Make fun of us for using the word “pop.”
Different regions have different terms. Your term isn’t better than ours. In fact, we think ours is the right one.
14. Assume our state consists only of flat farmland.
We have rolling hills, limestone bluffs, and state parks that will make you feel like you landed in another world. There’s plenty of diverse natural beauty here.
Did we miss any? We’d love to hear your experiences. For more of Iowa’s awesomeness, here are 11 Things You Have To Do Before You’re An Official Iowan.