13 Awkward Moments Every Hawaii Local Has Endured At Least Once
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Megan Shute
Author
Awkward moments are undoubtedly a part of life – regardless of where you live. But when you live in the most isolated population center on earth – the Hawaiian Islands – you’re sure to encounter awkward encounters that are entirely unique from those you’ll find elsewhere across the world. I’m sure most Hawaii locals can relate to these uncomfortable – and perhaps slightly funny – situations.
Here’s a common scenario: you spend all morning choosing which beach to go, pack up all your stuff, get in the car and drive to your favorite beach (for the third time this week), just to just to realize that it’s started raining and you have to head somewhere else.
Being Hawaiian isn’t the same as being a Californian - Hawaiians are a race, and only those who can trace their roots back to the islands’ original Polynesian settlers. In fact, only about 10 percent of Hawaii’s population are native Hawaiians; everyone else is a Hawaii resident, or local.
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Once when I was visiting my family back on the mainland, I threw a shaka when a woman stopped to let me cross the street in front of her car. She obviously didn’t know what I was doing and glared at me like I was using a gang sign. The same goes for using da kine, mahalo, and howzit in the same conversation - all to some pretty confused looks.
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How do you not take a photograph every time you witness a quintessential Hawaiian sky? This is particularly awkward when you take out your phone to show someone a photograph and have to scroll through weeks worth of sunset photos to find what you’re looking for.
There are so many films and television shows that don’t do the Aloha State any justice at all. Some of them even make a mockery of Hawaiian culture and history. But you will also have a newfound appreciation of the few movies that perfectly capture the Aloha spirit - like Lilo & Stitch.
News flash: Hawaiian pizza wasn't invented in Hawaii. Also, there really is nothing Hawaiian about Hawaiian pizza – except for the pineapples, I guess.
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Not only might touching an endangered green sea turtle result in up to 30 days in jail or a fine of up to $2,000, but it’s just plain rude. No one wants to correct your bad behavior, so please, just give the sea turtles and monk seals some space, please.
Homelessness is a major problem in Hawaii - so please don’t expect any laughs. Hawaii has the third largest homeless population per capita in the country; an estimated 487 out of every 100,000 residents are homeless, according to Movoto. Since the year 2000, the homeless population in Hawaii has increased by 61 percent, and while many once lived on the beaches 24/7, these individuals have since been driven into local neighborhoods, especially on Oahu.
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The only islands you can take a ferry between are Maui and Lanai, and Maui and Molokai. Yes, there used to be a ferry between Oahu and Maui, and no, it is not still running. We have to fly to the neighboring islands. We also don’t ride our pet dolphins to work - though I do know a guy who supposedly kayaks from Ewa Beach to Pearl Harbor for work, so there’s that.
On the mainland, especially in the northern states, everyone wears flip flops (ahem, slippers) and shorts when it hits 50 degrees, but in Hawaii, you better believe that we’ll be wearing a sweatshirt and jeans as soon as the temperature drops below 75… after all, the only places you’ll experience cold weather (and sometimes snow) in Hawaii is at the summit’s of the islands’ tallest mountains.
We only need one word to explain: Costco. Because the cost of living in paradise is so astronomically high, and a gallon of milk will easily cost you between $6-10, we shop in bulk. So, please excuse our well-stocked fridges and worry about your own problems.
Kaneohe, Waianae, Ewa, Wahiawa... and that’s just on the island of Oahu. While this is certainly annoying, the worst is when someone mentions that you pronounce "Hawaii" funny. Because there’s no way they could be pronouncing it incorrectly. Insert eye roll here.
Just because we live in a tropical island setting that so many tourists visit each year, doesn’t mean we get to live like we’re on a constant, never-ending vacation. We are not immune from the stresses and problems of modern-day life just because we live in "paradise."
What other awkward situations have you encountered as a result of living in Hawaii? While not everything about living in Hawaii is awesome, we certainly are lucky to live in Hawaii.
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