Florida February 02, 2017
12 Things No Self-Respecting Floridian Would Ever Do
We Floridians pride ourselves in being pretty laid-back and easy-going most of the time, but there are a few rules even we adhere to. Even though we’re generally friendly folks, our state is different than any other. So if you want to live here, it helps to know a few things no Floridian would ever do:
1. Take the first spot we see without looking for shade.
Unless you like being burned by your seatbelt, a shady spot is worth a lot more than a close spot.
2. Go outside in this.
In the lightning capital of the country, we know that lightning is no joke.
3. Complain about the heat.
We're used to it, and complaining doesn't change it, so why bother.
4. Give up their beloved flip-flops.
These are perfectly acceptable footwear year-round, regardless of the temperature or occasion.
5. Mess with one of these.
While many Floridians might not be "afraid" of gators, you can bet that they're smart enough to respect them.
6. Freak out about a little rain.
It rains almost every day here in the summer, so you can't worry about little things like getting your hair wet every now and then.
7. Wish for cold weather.
8. Call this "pop."
Some of us use Southern slang, depending on where you are in the state, but Northern and Midwestern slang is pretty much nonexistent here.
9. Visit theme parks in the summer.
We've been to enough theme parks and through enough Florida summers to know that the two do not mix. Who wants to spend all day stuck in a line in 95-degree weather?
10. Spend winters anywhere else.
Winters in Florida are so beautiful that they make the sweltering summers worth the wait. That's why you won't catch us leaving the state during the winter, no matter how many snowbirds have taken over our towns.
11. Get caught with a terrible sunburn.
If you grew up in Florida, you should probably know how to take care of your skin in the sun by now.
12. Freak out at the first sign of a storm.
Even though we all know how serious these things can be, Floridians try not to get worried about every single storm. After all, we have a whole hurricane season.
What do you think? Do you have any others to add to our list?