Anyone who’s been thinking about moving to Southern California might seriously want to reconsider. Just take a look at these dreadful things we have to put up with here in SoCal. For those of us who already live here, we just want to make sure you know what you’re getting yourself into. You really don’t want to move here. Ever.
1. The weather here is so unpredictable.
Some days it's 70 degrees and other days it's 75. How can you plan for that kind of fluctuation in temperature?!
2. It's impossible to decide where to eat.
With so many award-winning restaurants, hidden local gems, and mouthwatering cuisine to choose from, you'll actually have too many decisions to make. And who wants to be faced with so many delicious decisions when all you want to do is find a place to eat?
3. The scenery is incredibly distracting.
Trying to focus while driving is nearly impossible. You might have to pull over to the side of the ride to take a picture because the landscape is so mesmerizing. What a hassle.
4. The people here never smile. I mean NEVER.
Who can put up with that kind of attitude?!
5. The beaches in Southern California have no personality.
Just look at all that sand, blue sky, and crystal clear water. Who wants to spend a day surrounded by such predictable scenery.
6. You're forced to go hiking year-round in SoCal.
Because it's always so nice outside, everyone feels obligated to get out and seize the day and experience a new hiking trail. What a hassle to have the opportunity to be outside every day when all you want to do is stay home and watch TV.
7. It's impossible to find fresh fruits and vegetables.
You might go hungry as you search for a colorful ripe piece of fruit at a local farmer's market. If only there was more variety here!
8. You can't go outside. EVER. SERIOUSLY.
If you go outside you might get too much of that sunshine vitamin. And that just sounds dangerous if you ask me.
9. The year-round summer breeze makes it hard to know what to wear.
A light jacket? A sweater? No jacket at all? It seriously requires way too much wardrobe planning to live here.
10. There's never anything to do.
It's BORING in SoCal with a capital B. We just stay home all day and wish there was actually something fun to do.
11. We can only eat outside 360 days of the year.
It's annoying to have 5 days out of the year when you can't enjoy a beautiful dinner alfresco. The inconvenience is enough to make anyone decide that SoCal is simply a terrible place to leave.
12. Living in Southern California will ruin you for life.
Living here is a hazard because there's no other place that will ever stack up to SoCal. So it's just better to never live here so you won't know what you're missing. Seriously, just stay away.
13. If you're afraid of heights this is a terrible place to live.
The mountains here are just way too high. Looking out over the towering mountains might make you feel dizzy as you take in all the beauty. It's better just to avoid SoCal all together instead of risk this kind of danger.
14. You'll never want to travel anywhere else.
Once you have a taste of what it's like in SoCal, you may never want to travel to see other parts of the world. Why even bother living in a place that will put a damper on your desire to travel to other locations?
15. Everyone will want to visit you.
Friends, family, and distant cousins will all want to visit you because you live in the most beautiful part of the country. How embarrassing to have so many people want to spend time with you.
Are you convinced yet? Do you see why you should stay away from Southern California now? It is such a hassle to live in this kind of place. Trust me. Trust all of us who live here, you really don’t want to be in SoCal. Seriously, please don’t move here.