Each state has its own subculture and quirks that residents carry with them even when they cross state lines. If you encounter someone with the following 15 qualities, odds are you’ve found a New Mexican.
1. They are dressed in layers. One of these layers references the Lobos.
There’s usually a twenty-five degree temperature difference between the high and low, on any given day in New Mexico. We like to be prepared.
2. They’re wearing sunglasses. In December.
Albuquerque averages 278 sunny days per year, while Santa Fe has 283.
3. They’re riding a bike. Preferably up a vertical incline.
If you see someone kitted out in professional gear, pedaling under a scorching sun, fifty-miles from the nearest sign of civilization then you’ve successfully located a New Mexican.
4. They’re towing a horse trailer.
If they don’t own a horse themselves, they know someone who does. In fact, horse racing is the biggest spectator sport in the state.
5. They express surprise at the abundance of paved roads.
Their own windshield is a spider web of cracks.
6. They are operating something that you *think* counts as a vehicle.
If it rolls, they drive it.
7. Their overall driving “style.”
Let’s not review what happened when they tried to merge. And that signaling device sticking out of the steering wheel? It’s entirely decorative.
8. But they are completely unruffled by a coyote darting out into the road at night.
Please, they can dodge those suckers, blindfolded.
9. They’re involved in the rescue of a stray or injured animal.
And they’re willing to drive it an hour in any direction to get it home, or to a vet.
10. They’re surprised by how monolingual many other states are.
Spain used to rule New Mexico and 9.39% of New Mexicans only speak Spanish. According to New Mexico law, all voting-related paperwork must be in both Spanish and English.
11. They flinch at the mention of Columbus Day.
He’s not exactly a hero in New Mexico.
12. They are either amazed or appalled by the vast number of people elsewhere.
On average, there are only 17 people per square mile in New Mexico.
13. They discuss the air.
Hey, they’re not used to so much oxygen.
14. They lament the blandness of the food.
Hot sauce is not an appropriate substitute for chile.
15. They’re surprised that you don’t have an extra freezer.
Seriously, how do you intend to store your chile?